March 25- Mind And Soul At War And Heart Torn In Between

I know I said in my previous entry that it was a good day to die, and in my mind, I still do wish I would not still be here. However, my soul has defied my mind and has once again risen from the ashes. I like to think of my mind, heart, and soul as being three separate bodies inside one vessel. My mind is constantly at war with my soul, and my heart is caught in the middle.
My mind tells my soul that enough is enough and that it is pointless to keep coming back alive only to be killed once more by the way people are in the world today. My soul continues to fight back because it wants so badly to be seen for the female it really is and will not give up until that day comes. My heart is like a rope that my mind and soul tug upon because half of it agrees that enough is enough and does not want to be shattered anymore, but the other half wants so badly to be loved and wanted by someone who will both accept and understand in order to be loved for just being itself and not for any other alternative motives.
What can I do? I guess since my soul is pretty much what makes me ME, I have no choice but to continue on rising up from the ashes until it decides to finally cease to exist. Take care and be safe always everyone.